Friday, June 6, 2008


I don't know what to do. I don't know why sometimes this just clicks & it's easy as can be, and other times it just doesn't. Why sometimes my heart & head say "get it together" but my body doesn't listen & goes through the motion of old habits. I don't know what to do anymore. If I keep doing what I'm doing, I WILL gain all my weight back.

It's probably not the right answer, but I thought about cancelling my WW subscription. Let's face it, I haven't been using it. But then in the back of my mind, I think about how one of my 2008 goals was to celebrate my WW anniversary in August. Which is only 2 months away. But what good is an anniversary if you're not working the program. And what good is an anniversary if you have gained back half of what you've lost.

I have become a person that lets one thing get me off course. Monday I was supposed to go to the gym w/my friend. She couldn't end up going, but another friend said she'd go with me. Well, at the last minute she backed out... so so did I. I did go grocery shopping, but I shouldn't have gone to the store that I did b/c they didn't have half of the stuff I had on my list. I was PMSing and literally almost cried in the meat aisle because they didn't have ground turkey. They also didn't have a number of other items that I wanted. So I got an effing pizza & some ice cream & called it a day. I stayed home sick on Tuesday, so I didn't go to my WW meeting. I just let these outside forces take over and control me.

I don't know what to do or how to fix myself at this point. I want to be back in the healthy mindset, but I'm just not there right now.

Tell me what to do, cuz I don't know.


lifeshouldbestereo said...

I don't know what to tell you dear, other than to keep going and stick with it as good as you can. I've been 'losing' the same 10 pounds over and over this year.. getting nowhere really. But I try to tell myself that I'm still learning and with every successful day, I have learned something new about myself and my body. Even if it is followed by a less successful day. Must remain positive.

Trisaratops said...

Oh, I've been there too, honey! My weight loss has been at a very slow pace, and sometimes I get really frustrated by that, but we must be gentle with ourselves.It has taken me this long to figure out trigger foods, what emotional things will send me over the edge, and what foods make me feel satisfied without breaking the calorie bank. So remember that this is a long journey, you're changing bad habits, easy habits, and it won't be easy. So here is my bossy opinion advice:
1. You are PMSing so cut yourself some slack and just do the best you can for the next week during TOM - its so hard for me to stay on plan during that time.
2. Re-read your last post and try to follow your action plan - it sounded great to me!
3. As for gym motivation - a partner does make a difference. But on those days when you are solo - can you make a deal with yourself, that if you go for 15 minutes, that's enough? And most likely after 15 minutes you'll be willing to do more. Another thought, is take a calendar, and give yourself a big X for each day you exercise. Or, can you reward yourself with a new nail polish, a massage or something? Or, when you say to yourself "don't wanna" maybe you have to argue and say "I know you don't wanna, but you'll feel better if you do"
4. Someone once asked me "What are you filling with food?" Sometimes I have to look at what the why I choose the pizza instead of something better.

Also, if you are cooking something, you could make a double batch and freeze it, so that when you don't want to cook, you have something in the freezer to re-heat that can be as easy as the pizza. I know you will find your way - you have had so much success, I completely believe that you will have success again. You will, you will, you will. Good luck - and don't give up your membership - just go and grab a no weigh pass! Sending you lots of motivation and hope and strength...

Lyn said...

Teale you can do it. You can get a grip and force yourself to just do what you gotta. It is hard. I hate it too some days. Sometimes it helps me to go back and read my old blog posts. But the bottom line is to, as my friend says, "tell your feelings to shut up" and just do the healthy eating and exercise no matter how you feel about it. (I don't mean to totally bottle up your feelings... just the ones that are detrimental to your health!)

There isn't an easy answer or an easy way, but you have shown you can do this. Remember that if you can get a few good days under your belt, it WILL get easier and the momentum will carry you. Don't give up. Life is so much better when you're taking care of yourself.

Heather said...

dont think that "quitting" WW means that you are quitting anything. too often I feel that people stick wtih things because they want them to work or have it in their mind that one day it will work. and sure, following the plan to a T will result in weight loss. but dont you think that maybe there is a reason that you cant stick to WW? perhaps it is not right for you. Im not saying this as someone who was on it and thinks it sucks, Im saying this as someone who has been there. WW stopped working for me becasue it wasnt right. and perhaps that is what is happening to you. Dont feel obligated to stay with someothing if its just not working. those are just my thoughts because I went off plan so many times with WW and now something about what Im doing clicks and you just need to find somethign that clicks with you too. that makes sense, that makes it all worth while. but dont be afraid of gaining that weight back, stay positive and really think about what you want and how you can achieve that.

You'd be so pretty if... said...

It's like I'm reading my story when I red your blog. I've not even blogged in a loooong time cause I've almost given up. I've gained back almost all of the 17 lbs that I've worked so hard to lose. I don't know what my problem is. I just can't jump on the wagon. It's so frustrating. If you ever want to talk my e-mail address is Feel free.

Lauren said...

I'm kind of at a loss myself, the only thing I can suggest is to choose one thing, it doesn't have to be exercise or whatever, but just one thing today that will make you feel good about yourself and like you accomplished something, and do it no matter what. then do the same thing tomorrow, but one day at a time.

Anonymous said...

What about swimming or cycling? I haven't tried either, but maybe a different kind of exercise will.

Actually, I have been trying to swim lately. I feel so slender in the water.

You can do it Teale. I'm trying hard too and screwing it up, but if we try a little each day (1 donut instead of 2? 4 cookies instead of 6?) maybe we can make new habits.

I'm sure I'm not being helpful, just wanted to show support.


Sueellen said...

Hi there, I just started reading your site and of course came across this post. I can't tell you any magic words to fix how you are feeling but I can share with you that I think that you have it in you to fight this and move forward. Remember, its not a "diet" but a journey and on every journey there are bumps in the road. The challenge is always how we handle those bumps; consider this one of those bumps and jump right over it and move on. HUGS